Held Within the Beat of Your Heart by lostintranslation21

Reading this SVU fic was painful for me on two levels. The writing itself made trying to get into the story and connect with the characters difficult. Typos, omitted words, using the same adjectives and phrases over and over, sometimes within the same sentence, made this moderately long work hard to get through.

The plot was very original; I’m fairly certain I’ve never read anything like it before. Here’s the basic premise: Alex and Olivia are abducted after having a semi-work related dinner together. They are beaten and taken by two men to an abandoned warehouse where the bad guys force Olivia to beat and rape Alex. Sounds interesting and different and has some potential, right? Well, I thought so, too. This is where the writing and grammar got to me. But there’s more that added to my discomfort. I don’t want to give too much away but I feel safe sharing that within two days of the abduction – yes, they get away – Alex and Olivia are having sex. Rough sex. Alex is into BDSM, which is fine with me. I don’t think I have too many sexual hang-ups but the context of the sexual play within the larger abuse and rape background just seemed a bit much for me.

The author wants to show the reader that healing can come from the characters’ new found intimacy and the love and trust required for BDSM, but the majority of the last half of the story is really not much more than one sex scene after another. I just could not connect with the characters and caught myself frowning or grimacing through almost the entire thing. Even my wife noticed. There were several times when she walked into the room to see me with my face in my ereader and said, “you’re still reading that SVU one, aren’t you?”

I think if the author worked with a good beta and did some revisions it could be a much better story. The premise is what drew me to it. Being able to write a fair review was the only thing that compelled me to finish it.

http://web.archive.org/web/20071015085613/ralst.com/Held1.HTM

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