The Nipple Factory by JLNicky and Honeybakedham

Don’t you just hate that – the beginning of chaos in you world of definite order. It might be a stack of books not put away on the right shelf in the bookcase, a number of half-finished items of food in the fridge, the enormous amount of shoes that accumulate in the closet with every change of season …… Well actually I’m not a neat freak; I do tend to leave little piles of things lying around the house, where I think that I might need them ….soon. I mean why put yesterday’s newspaper away if you didn’t finish reading it? I’ll surly …not… get around to reading it tomorrow, but one can always hope.

Major Shiela Patton certainly don’t agree with leaving piles of stuff around that don’t fit in her well-ordered military warehouse, so when a delivery from Babies 1st Nipples of 100.000 baby bottle replacement nipples arrive at the door she immediately set into action – this stuff has to go back NOW. Unfortunately that does prove to be a rather difficult task to carry out, even if you have a commanding attitude like Major Patton.

If you want your protagonist butch, look no further for your fun. Major Patton is everything you need – six feet tall and sharply dressed in fatigue and combat boots, with an athletic body and raven coloured hair, wearing sunglasses regardless of being inside, or out. So what can wear down a career soldier like our Major Patton ? Surly you must have guessed ? A woman’s tears !

And tears are what Major Patton encounters when she tries to get Bobbi Dellicroix – the owner of the Babies 1st Nipples company – to pick up the out-of-place goods from her warehouse. As you can imagine the tearful apologies of Bobbi convinces Major Patton to help rectify the problem herself – she loads up a 5 ton truck with the goods and drives off to meet Bobbi.

Did you guess ? You probably did! Yes – Bobbi is a small woman with the most beautiful green eyes! But she has something above and beyond green eyes which will keep Major Patton occupied for a while. If you want to know what it is, you will have to look up this story and go visit the war zone that the Major has landed in.

This is humour and at places actually rather fun, even if “The Nipple Factory” doesn’t really have a consistent storyline. When I think about it this story is essentially a number of funny one liners, and I guess that I chose to let you know about the story because I liked the basic idea of the storyline even if it wasn’t really explored to its full extent.

In the story a number of – let’s say – unnecessary characters fools around for no apparent reason. I get the feeling that some of these extra characters are moulded over “well-known” fictional characters that I’m not familiar with? What ever else might be the reason for including something like 15 siblings of the Major in a story 44 pages long?

As you might know I’m partial to the humour you can find in a standard Larisa storyline – so if you want humour and a bit of romance in a more structured storyline you could look up my favourite Larisa story “The Phantom” or perhaps “Kicking and Screaming”. Larisa has also written a story featuring a protagonist in the military it’s titled “Da Nang”. I didn’t find this story to be quit so funny and catching as other Larisa stories, but it seems to be well-liked by other readers as it has a high rating on The Athenaeum, so maybe it’s just that the war theme is not my cup of tea.

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